Monday, June 28, 2010


Fear is the motivation for many of us.We operate out of fear, make friends for fear of being lonely, strive in jobs we detest out of fear of losing our livelihood ,unabashedly lie to each other for fear of dispproval etc. etc.
We also fear new places, new interactions, new people and prefer to stay in the comfort zone, not taking any risks. We fear change,new routines,death,public speaking,exams , exam results, darkness endless list really.
If we examine 'fear' , it is not out there, not with the new places,people,jobs, routines but within ourselves . Fear is our inability to deal with the unexpected , unknown,new,different. Fear is the imagined difference between reality and our perception. If we could suspend our judgement about what should be out there or what we should be out there,trust ourselves to just be in any situation,go with the flow, fear would disappear.
Fear too , stems from our perception, may be far from reality. It is in our hands, literally, to contain it.It does not exist out there, it is created by us, from our inabilities.

Thursday, June 17, 2010


Detachment,a form of letting go, is key to happiness, equanimity and survival. Detachment from problems comes from an understanding that you are more than your problems, detachment from outcomes- because all that is in your control is your effort.Controlling what is not in your purview is foolish, madness.
What I cannot control, have any influence on , I must let go, and happily at that.
A simple yet powerful idea , if implemented in its truest sense , can lead to emancipation, freedom.
And pray what can we control?, the rising prices,pollution,ethics of the society, people around you, your boss? You may not be controlling them but secretly wishing they may change for the better. Can you?
Awareness of the dynamics followed by action/intervention only where you can make a difference is the key to liberation.Otherwise be inactive, passive and detached.

If you cannot control all of the above, what do you do? There is one person over whom you have the ultimate and complete 24/7 power, and that fortunate person is you!All that you want to do to others,to your circumstances and to your environment , do it to you.
"Be the change you want the world to be"- MK Gandhi

Friday, June 11, 2010

on truth

Then there is this oft repeated subject called 'Truth',somewhat maligned spiritually and philosophically. Seek truth they say. What does the word mean?
It means getting to the facts, being objective , not letting your perceptions and baggage cloud your interpretation.
There is nothing that we 'see' as is.Our senses pick the stimulus and our brain processes it. In doing so the information passes through various conscious and unconscious filters of our mind. The end result may be a case of 'chinese whispers', quite distorted from the original,the fact.
We get closer to the 'Truth' when we suspend our judgment, when we are open to another perspective, when our minds are in a receptive mode.
Most other times we are in delusion,We see, hear, taste, feel what we want to see, hear etc.We are simply validating our beliefs by distorting the truth around us to suit us, to feel comfortable.Truth is uncomfortable, we hide from it, run away from it, shut our eyes to it.Yet we all claim to be seekers of truth!
The biggest lie we tell is when we lie to ourselves, when we are not congruent, when we think one thought, say another and act still another.What are we afraid of? Others?The truth we have to live is with ourselves, not outside.Others may not know it, but we know when we lie. And we fall in our own eyes!

Thursday, June 10, 2010


I know that I talk,discuss,write,learn,teach, share those aspects of my life that are not yet sorted out,in which I lack clarity and understanding.
On those issues where I have achieved some grasp, I fall silent. I do not feel the need to speak, to share , to tell.
I also realize that I analyze certain issues,experiences where I do not need to. They are just meant to be observed, not commented upon, not dissected under a microscope. In doing so, the moment is lost , I am not in the 'now', I label and lose its soul, make it into an entity.
The deepest feelings and experiences cannot be described at all, words fail. In that trance like moment, I lose myself to the experience , I am in it and it is in me...rare , yet these moments happen, specially when I am outdoors, close to nature.
Thoughts cease, awareness of self ceases and a feeling of oneness,complete and total takes over.
I fall silent.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010


I have realized,rather late in life,not to chase perfection, to allow myself and others around me to make mistakes, learn, undo when possible and live with the consequences if irrevocable.
In no way does it mean that I aim to make mistakes. On the contrary, I plan and then leave the rest to unfold...sometimes it goes as per the plan and sometimes there are deviations.If I dwell too much on the abberation, I lose focus and spontaniety...I get mired in what 'must'/'ought'/'should'have been and thereby lose joy and satisfaction of the bigger goal/task that I was engaged in.
When I allow some imperfection in my life,I am compassionate towards myself, more human than God,in the now.
Working towards perfection is an impediment to creativity, serendipity. It promotes anxiety and is abrasive in interpersonal relationships.
Allowing imperfection is a form of letting go...a blissful state of mind.

Sunday, June 6, 2010


There is one kind of holiday when you pack your bags and go to another place , in doing so discover new places, people, experiences and it triggers new thoughts, learning and change in your perspective.Can be a lot of hard work as well!!
There is another kind of a holiday , which is taking a break from the daily routine, can be taken in your backyard, at the office while sipping coffee...when you appreciate the skyline of Bangalore as the black monsoon clouds roll in and rain pelts on the lush treetops.Its a holiday when you get up one day and decide not to go though the routine...instead...explore the city market on foot, do a long drive outside the city, go for a movie. Its a holiday when one Sunday you set the brunch in the backyard or terrace or some new place and not the dinning table, its a holiday when you sup on the terrace one night , under the stars , watching the moon rise between the treetops.
Holidaying is the art of relaxation, of spontaniety,of responding and giving in to your childlike instincts of having fun ,enjoying,appreciating the beauty of nature, of rejuvenating a tired mind ....of innate playfulness.It does not have to start someplace else , can happen right here , right now ...its in your mind .Do it.Enjoy.

Friday, June 4, 2010

On death

I for one cannot understand why death is associated with fear.I do not seem to get the connection at all . I can empathise with the emotion of grief for the death of a loved one irrevocable, permanent void, never to be filled and that leaves one paralysed for a while...but fear? where does that stem from it for one's own death? Is it for the process of dying?or is annihilation a daunting prospect?

Is the lack of acceptance for this inevitable event the underlying reason? ... to my mind it is simple ...what is born must die , anything alive , breakable , exhaustable is limited in its existence least in the form that we recognise...then what is the fear about?
I was born, I must die,just like a tumbler of glass which shatters one day.... what is so difficult to comprehend?
Are some of us under the delusion that since we are 'superior'in some way...materialistically, spiritually, we will be exempt from this? We go to great lengths to prolong life,avoid disease and then what do we do with the extra years? How many years and experiences are enough? When can I say I am done ...ready?

Thursday, June 3, 2010

On curios and photographs

When on a holiday , we begin clicking pictures as soon as we land and we collect curios of the local places we visit. I for one prefer pieces of wood, pebbles man made ones.The enitire trip seems to be captured in these two formats, set in time.
Makes we wonder whether these articles we gather and the pics we click help us to recall and capture the visit, moods , places or limit our memories to these two formats.At some level they are an impediment coz after some years that is all we remember of the places...the few pics and an odd inanimate object. If we did not have these,maybe,our memories will be more fresh and vivid ,we will have a larger repertoire of images to fall back upon,a new detail or scene may emerge if we trusted the mind's eye?
On a trip to Goa,I did not take the camera and clicked no pics , yet the memory of the place is intact ...will it still be after 20 years have elapsed when the memory will have faded or will i sit one evening with my son, with whom I took the holiday , and together we will unspool our memories, one scene at a time , each filling in the details of the outline that the other recalls?I wonder...